


Just You and Me...

by kangelique



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Dark Magic, F/M, Gen, Kings & Queens, Lieutenant Killian Jones/Princess Emma Swan, Magic, Monarchy, Princes & Princesses, Random & Short, Some Humor, Some sadness, Young Captain Hook | Killian Jones/Young Emma Swan, playfulness
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-22
Updated: 2019-03-03
Packaged: 2019-08-06 03:17:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 20,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16380383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kangelique/pseuds/kangelique
Summary: Emma and Killian in a collection of one shots in the alternative universe where they fall in love as king and queen, princess and prince, and is just purely random moments because I developed this weird fascination for monarchy and royalty and all that good stuff





	1. The Crown

**The Crown:**

She found him at the docks.

OF COURSE he was at the docks. She recalled not too long ago what he'd replied in adorable defense when she had teased him abut it,  _it-it just calls to me._

_"M-hm," she had leaned in and raised an eyebrow, "and...what else calls to you?"_

_He smirked, snaking his arms around her waist and tugging her to his chest. "Oh THAT I can gladly demonstrate."_

_"Please do."_

That one thought left her grinning like a fool, cheeks blushing furiously in the dark. Her real motive there had been a kiss, which he had happily delivered-more than one-once her intentions were clear. But that wasn't why she had sought him out in the middle of the night, and remembering why she had been unable to sleep in the first place was enough to downward her lips into a frown.

"Emma?"

Her eyes flicked away from her staring off into the distance to see his dark silhouette stand up and then walk toward her in quiet, elegant steps she knew being in the navy had taught him to do. Within just three strides he was in front of her and she felt herself sigh in relief even though she hadn't intended to; his presence already comforting and making her feel more relaxed.

A crease formed between his eyebrows and he cupped her cheek. "Sweetheart, what's wrong? You appear vexed."

She tried to give him a reassuring smile but it was too small and quickly fell since, it was true, she was vexed. He didn't believe her attempt for one second and took his hand from her cheek to gently grab her hand instead and then playfully tug her to sit down. That coaxed out a little giggle and she obliged, but decided to be un-princessy and dropped herself into his lap, smirking smugly when she caught his surprised look and then grinned down at her, shifting her so they were both comfortable and placing his hands at her hips to run soothing circles with his thumbs.

"I am." she whispered with her forehead to his, all playfulness gone and seriousness returned.

He rubbed his nose against hers and she tightened her arms around his neck. "Is it because of tomorrow?"

"Yes." she nodded, almost defeatedly, and tears prickled at her eyes that she desperately tried to blink away but he noticed and abruptly stopped his motion, bringing both hands up to her cheeks so she had to directly look at him when he said, "YOU will make a great ruler, love, don't you ever doubt that. Never, you hear me?"

"Yeah," she sniffed and his gaze didn't waver as he kept his attention on her, sadly knowing what was coming. "I just...I just wish they were here to see it."

"Hey," he wiped the tears that had begun to fall and she held back a sob, body trembling with her resistance. "your mother and father would be so proud of you to see the strong woman you've become and the even amazing queen you will be."

She ran a hand through his hair and then brought his head down to give a sweet kiss to his lips. "I love you."

He smiled. "And I you, my Queen."

She rolled her eyes, "I'm not queen  _yet,_ Killian."

"But after tomorrow you will be, and trust me I will be the one cheering so loudly in the crowd that they'll have to throw me out."

She chuckled and he dove in for a kiss in the middle of it, catching her mouth open and then slowly pulling her down with him until his back was pressed against the wood and she was on top of him, sweet and lazy kisses being exchanged until they became more ardent and soon their tongues were dancing furiously with each other, his hands going up and down her arms and her gripping his shoulders hard, breathing uneven and wanting more.

He was the one to pull away first and she whined, " _Kiiillian"_

"As cute as you look when you pout like that, tomorrow is still your coronation and I don't think the people in town will appreciate hearing your moans before we even get to the ripping our clothes part."

She slapped his chest, indignant. "I don't moan that loud!"

He gave her a pointed look. "Must I recall your birthday party?"

She blushed at the memory and almost got away with it, but he felt her risen heat under his palm and grinned victorious. "I blame you COM-PLETE-LY for that."

Killian shrugged, still grinning wickedly. "Then I take full fault as long as I'M the one making you moan like that."

Shaking her head she rolled off his chest and then stood up, dusting her dress from the specks of sand she couldn't see, and with a sigh he forced himself up too and readjusted his shirt that had been untucked from the loose belt and was now currently revealing the bare skin underneath that she had fiercely run her hands up just moments before. Once they were both looking slightly more appropriate than the disheveled appearance they had been sporting, he turned to her with his still wild hair that indicated the needy fingers that had begun to tug and seep, and wrapped his arms around her waist, pecking her lips one final time before pulling away and pressing a small kiss to her forehead too.

"Smile tomorrow, okay?" he whispered against her skin.

"For you?" she questioned, even though she knew what he would say.

"No, for you."

 

                                                                ....................................................................

 

Emma turned to face her kingdom and the applause erupted for the newly crowned queen. It rattled the church windows and her smile was in no way forced when everyone in unison shouted, ' _Long live the Queen!'_ . The eyes of every follower and noblemen were on her but she seeked out Killian in the crowd and when their eyes met, he winked and mouthed 'I love you' before clapping even harder and his whoop getting swallowed up by the roaring cheers.

And she swore...she swore that she felt her mother and father's presence right there with her as she took her seat on the throne and then saw them right there, standing silently at the back and wearing proud smiles for the daughter they hadn't seen grow up. And yet, she felt as if it was them putting the crown on her head, because in that moment their love had been strong enough to walk through worlds. To walk through death.

Today, she realized she had never been alone.

 


	2. The Rose

**The Rose:**

"I will find a way."

She turned to leave, lips set in a tight line and anger barely concealed when out of the corner of her eyes she saw his hand flying out to stop her and immediately spun back around, just out of his reach, but he was still too dangerously close when he dropped his voice low and spoke to her ears only,

"And I'll be waiting. There is no escaping this, Emma. You don't get many choices as a woman." slowly, a smile appeared as he backed away and held her gaze, so triumphantly reminding her, "as I'm sure you've come to notice."

Her eyes were burning lasers and her next words were delivered through gritted teeth. "DO NOT try to touch me again. We are not married yet, you have no rights."

He smirked and she wished for all the permission in the world to be able to punch it right off his smug persona. "But once we are you  _and_ your body will be all mine, and as the dutiful queen to her country you will be obedient and produce the heirs needed to keep  _yourself_ as a valuable chess piece in this game," he winked and her nose wrinkled in disgust. "Keep that in mind as you enjoy the festival!" is what he threw back over his shoulder with a wave before he disappeared around the corner and was finally,  _finally_ out of her sight.

"I didn't think it was possible to hate him more, but turns out it is."

Emma jumped unintentionally and a small gasp escaped her, still shaken up by Neal's presence and his silent threat  _you and your body will be all mine_ fearfully swimming around in her head.

"I'm sorry, love, I didn't mean to startle you." Killian's came up behind her to wrap his arms around her waist, loosely, in case she wanted to pull away but she didn't and instead leaned back into the warmth he always provided.

"No...no, it's okay, it's just he..."

Pushing her hair away with his nose, he gave her cheek a tender kiss that helped ease her worries, and then dropped his chin to her shoulder with a sigh. "I know."

She became limp then and he didn't hesitate to bury his face into the side of her neck to breathe her in, tightening his arms as he did. "I hate that you had to hear that." despite trying not to, her voice still wobbled at the end.

"Aye, me too," he spoke softly against her skin. "but he won't touch you, I promise," and suddenly his tone turned fierce and she knew his jaw was clenched. " _I Swear_ he will not, I'll kill him before he even gets the chance to lay a hand on you, Emma, that much you can be certain of."

Turning in his arms so she could face him, she placed both hands at his chest and caressed the lapels of his dark coat with her thumbs and looked up at him with a smile that she knew he knew was forced. "But then you will get beheaded or removed from your own throne for killing the son of the king who can spin gold, and," she reached up on her tippy-toes to slide her hand around the nape of his neck. "I need you very much  _alive_ if you're to marry me and finally become my husband."

"And you, my wife."

"Exactly." she grinned and pulled his head down for a kiss.

He captured her lips easily and responded to her passion as equally when his hand came to tangle in her hair, tugging her closer and quickly dipping his tongue into her mouth as she rushed to meet his pace before anybody saw. They tried to pull apart after a minute but both craved for more and soon he had her back against the wall, panting hard, lips swollen, and still diving in, tongues dancing desperately, until they managed to break away only for the lack of air and the fact that they were both coming close to stumbling into a room if they didn't stop. They stayed there with their foreheads resting against each other's, feeling as their breath returned and waiting for their heartbeat to slow down enough to finally speak again.

"This gets more painful every time, Killian," she whispered with her eyes clenched tight, trying not to think about how each time could be their last time with Neal looming in the shadows and the King of Gold constantly pushing for marriage between their two countries.

"We  _will_ find a way, Emma."

A tear slid down her cheek and her smile was broken, "Just like my parents used to say."

"Yes," he smiled too, and it also came shattered because he remembered her mother and father perfectly and it hurt to see her cry. "Just like your parents used to say."

She sniffed and he leaned down to place a soft kiss on the tip of her nose.

"Now I want you to do something."

"What?"

"Go and enjoy the festival, and out of everything, DO NOT let that scumbag of a prince ruin it for you, my darling."

Emma smiled and this time it was less watery. "Honestly, I love you."

He tilted her chin up to give her a sweet, slow kiss and then lightly wiped away the remaining teardrops stuck to her cheeks with the back of his hand. "And I, you."

                 

                                                                 ..............................................................

 

They let their fingers slide away from each other once they were in close perimeter to the sound of children's happy laughter and men and women enjoying themselves with the various booths that had been set up throughout the extensive palace grounds that was still glittering from the light rainshower that had fallen earlier that day. Once outside they walked away in opposite directions, careful not to glance back even though rumors about the Queen of Misthaven and the heir to the kingdom of Tramorekeen being in love had been circling around recently, so it made Emma wonder why they tried to hide it.

She wandered around aimlessly, too distracted by her thoughts to be able to fix her attention elsewhere, until an hour or so later of watching everyone else have fun she came upon the area that had been set apart for archery, where a crowd had gathered to admire the numerous men and even some women each taking their turn at the bow-mostly arrogant noblemen and the occasional prince appearing to lazily come up and shoot the arrow.

_Her_   prince was among them. She spotted him quickly and immediately decided to take a seat on one of the golden chairs set out for the members of the royal family to await his turn. It made her a bit fidgety when each individual shot the arrow but missed too greatly or came too close because Emma, herself, knew she  _could_ get the bull's eye, but remained seated with her hands firmly clasped together on her lap.

A small proud smile came when Killian DID get the bull's eye and...OKAY, she was only the slightest bit jealous because if there was one thing they both were, it was competitive, and trying to beat the other in archery was indeed a favorite past time that somehow always resulted in giggling and searing kiss after the other.

The reward for hitting the bull's eye was a single rose given to the winner so he or she could give it to his or her boyfriend/girlfriend. A frown surfaced on her face then before she could make her expression impassive to the longing sighs and fluttering eyelashes in Killian's direction from the various women in the crowd, obviously wanting to be given the rose by the handsome prince. This time she was a different kind of jealous, and to say that she wanted to shoot them all glares and tell them to back off because he was  _hers,_ was an understatement. Yet she managed to remain composed and decided to be indifferent to whoever he chose to give the rose to by focusing on her nails instead to wait for the next person to step up and shoot.

Her green eyes widened in surprise when those familiar black boots appeared in front of her, and she looked up to see a brow arched and a slight smirk saying  _did you ever doubt it?_

"For you, love."

She took the flower with a quiet 'Thank you' and the smile only he was able to bring out, cheeks tainted a beautiful crimson that made him grin widely. 

The rose was a promise.

_We WILL find a way._

 


	3. The Dark

**The Dark:**

"Emma."

The hallway was eerily quiet; it made her beautiful name sound like a haunting when it echoed throughout the walls on either side of him.

He couldn't help the small shudder that coursed through his bones then, as if a sudden gust of evil had just passed right by him and continued running behind him, missing him completely.

After all, the evil had already found its mark.

It didn't need him. It had already targeted the one love in his life, the one light, and set out to destroy it. To destroy  _her._

"Well I won't let it," he said through gritted teeth, hoping she would hear him, somewhere, wherever she was, and know that she was not alone in this.

Killian was every bit willing to take on the darkness with her,  _if only you would let me, Emma._

But she wouldn't. She wouldn't let him feel her pain and allow it to slowly diminish his soul too, much like he wouldn't let her suffer because he was suffering. That was always the problem. Each one always trying to protect the other and ending at distant points.

He walked blindly, pitch black in front of him making him squint in an effort that was useless, feeling himself grow more and more desperate.

"Emma?"

A low whimper came and he spun on reflex, only to find and see nothing. It had come close, so  _very_ close, and it sparked up hope that was equal torture and relief.

"Sweetheart," he spoke tentatively, careful not to scare her or have her scurry away before he could catch her; the demons in her head would not be happy and immediately pound and make her blood boil until she would scream, that's what she had told him that one night they had been in peace.

_"What is it, darling?" Killian caressed her cheek, adoring the softness of it, and she closed her eyes, relaxing into his touch._

_"It's just..." her voice trembled and he quickly comforted her, bringing his mouth to her ear to begin singing the first few lyrics of their song-the song that helped calm her._

_It did. He felt the tension leave her body and relax once again in his arms._

_"Just what?" he whispered, encouraging her as she curled up more into his heat and placed her head where his heart was._

_"The monsters, the demons..they don't like it when it gets loud, they tell me to keep it quiet so I can hear them or else..."_

_"No. Don't listen to them, Emma."_

_"And they..." she swallowed thickly and he tightened his arm around her shoulder. "They hate you, Killian. They hate how you love me. They hate this, how you're holding me and keeping me safe from them. They threatened me."_

_"But do you hate how I love you?"_

_A smile appeared-the first he'd seen in months. "No."_

_He gave her a sweet kiss. "Then that's all that matters."_

"It's me, Killian, where are you? Emma, love, please talk to me, direct me towards you. Say something, make any sound, it's okay."

Silence.

He sighed and opened his mouth to speak again when he spotted her. A miracle, really, but it was thanks to her hands that were glowing the slightest bit of white, that he was able to see her and immediately drop to his knees in front of her to gently remove her hands from the tight grip they held her hair in fists as she mumbled something incoherent again and again.

"Hey...hey, it's me. It's alright," he cupped her face firmly to stop the shake of her head and used his thumbs to slowly wipe away the tears sliding down her cheeks so as not to startle her. "it's alright, my love, it's alright. Focus on my voice, I'm going to sing you our song, okay?" he moved her head to place it softly on his shoulder and then angled his lips at her ear-that was currently on fire like the rest of her body. " _Tomorrow is uncertain...who knows what it will bring...but one thing is for sure, love, with you I have everything...a happy ever aft-"_

She suddenly screamed and her entire body burst aflame so much that it burned him where he was touching her and he jumped back with his fingers sizzling, smell of smoke taking over their space.

"KILLIAN," she spoke fast, breathing heavily. "Killian, Killian, help me, help me, it's not working, it's not working," a painful shriek  reverberated around them and he was at a loss, split between what he wanted to do and what he had to do. "KILLIAN MAKE IT STOP, MAKE IT STOP, MAKE IT-"

He dug the needle deep into her finger and she fell limp into his arms, gasp cut and breathing abruptedly paused. He buried his face in her hair, hating that she couldn't respond, hating it had come to this. "I'm sorry, Emma," he clenched his eyes shut. "I must keep you this way until I find a way to rid you of the darkness. Forgive me, my love, forgive me,"

And he would keep her her that way.

Even if it took years. 

Decades.

 

 


	4. The Petal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm a bit sad that I wasn't able to post anything for halloween even though I had a few ideas but not enough time (NEVER ENOUGH TIME) but I was able to finish this one shot today and wasn't going to torture myself with waiting to post it so here it is, I hope you like it!

**The Petal:**

"Killian, seriously, where are we going?"

"Patience, love, patience," he calmly diverted her question with just a tad of amusement in his voice because he knew her too well, and he knew that  _waiting_ was not one of her strongest qualities, so she would question again at some point.

She rolled her eyes but brought her arms around his waist as he started the horse on a light throttle. "Might I remind you that queens do not get to have these little escapes anymore."

"You mean no more time for fun..." he mumbled under his breath with a slight shake of his head, and the frown that appeared on her face had him worrying if this was really a good idea, but he carried on anyway, quickly stomping on the thoughts that told him otherwise.

"It's just..." she trailed off for a minute and let out a tired sigh that made  _his_ lips fall down for the constant stress she was in. "I haven't even started on the preparations for the ball, two days isn't enough time, and of course the noblemen decide to come this week of ALL the other weeks to discuss a new trading plan that I honestly haven't given a  _single_ thought to-"

The horse suddenly threw itself into a full out gallop at Killian's 'HIYAH!' and Emma let out a shriek, too distracted by her rambling and jolted by the motion that she reflexively tightened her arms around him, and he smirked.

"What was that, love?" he called over the wind slapping their faces and wildly whipping her golden strands around everywhere. "Something about politics?"

"Ha, ha," she dryly replied in his ear and then turned her head to plant a soft kiss on his cheek that was her way of saying  _okay, okay, I get it_. "Very funny."

"That IS what I was aiming for."

Eventually (as the ride went along) he felt her relax behind him, and he smiled triumphantly when he glanced back and saw her mesmerized by the landscape passing by instead of lost in the thoughts of everyone that was currently demanding something of her and her position. It was a part of her, Killian knew this, but it wasn't  _her._ It wasn't his Emma. And he knew that as much as she whined and complained she secretly did like his surprises.

They rode for a few more minutes, getting closer to their destination. He almost wanted to throw his surprise out the window and just continue riding endlessly, so as to stretch his time with her longer, but he knew she couldn't be away from the castle too much-and neither could he-without the guards coming to give him hell- _well damn you, August-_ so he slowly brought the horse to a light throttle again, and with a low but firm 'whoa' made the animal finally stop by gently pulling on the reins.

"So where are we..."

A pointed look from his direction immediately cut her off because  _no, I will not tell you,_ and  _for the love of God, Emma, it is a surprise!._ She heaved a loud sigh and made a show of blowing it out in frustation that he simply responded to by throwing her a sweet smile, taking it as an indication that she was going to make this easier and comply.

He gets down first and then turns-as always-to help her. "Alright, love, down you go."

She rolls her eyes good-naturedly but places her hands on his shoulders and allows him to set his hands on her hips, using him for balance she gives a little jump forward and he easily catches her with a graceful swoop to then deposit her on the ground firmly on her feet. Emma laces her fingers through his, and he turns around without hesitation to pull her into the trees even as she gives him a skeptical sidelong glance. A nod from him spurs her to begin walking. Their slow trek doesn't last long before his steps are suddenly quickening and soon their running, her laughter echoing his smile as they zigzag tall tree trunks, almost tripping over scattered rocks and overgrown roots, and all he can think about it is  _I love you,_ until they finally come to an abrupt stop, breathless and panting hard, dirt caking them up to their ankles and more than a few leaves having gotten stuck in her hair, adorning it like gleaming emeralds in the sunlight.

Killian waits for the air to gather back in his lungs-partly because he  _really_ needs to breathe, but mostly because he suddenly feels nervous and wants to buy up some time to get his courage in place-before fixing his attention on Emma and asking in a soft whisper (one that is almost inaudible if not for the fact that they are standing shoulder to shoulder and her height gives him the pleasant advantage to just lean down ever so slightly and feel the small shiver that courses through her body when his mouth ghosts over her ear),

"Do you like it?"

He sometimes thinks it's silly, but he's come to realize that he'll always be undoubtedly nervous when it comes to Emma and surprises. Voice dropping to a level of quietness, more out of shyness than anything else, and his expression shrinking back in timidness as he regards her, still as incapable from keeping the crimson out of his cheeks as he was when he was still a young prince trying to make conversation with the girl whose hair was a stunning gold.

Growing up a princess, she had been considered what the people at court liked to call 'odd', but it was exactly what had drew him in. Where the other girls liked to be outside enjoying a cup of tea, Emma preferred to be holed up in the library devouring one book after the other and then afterwards leaving to attend her hourly swordsmanship sessions without fail. And she was a BEAST at it too, everything that his older brother and various other boys liked to point out was not suited for a lady or for the future queen of their country simply because she was a  _girl ._ He likes to think that it was when he was splat on his back, her holding him down with her knee, covered in hard-earned sweat and grinning at him with the tip of the sword pressed at the base of his throat was when he had fallen completely and irreversibly in love with her.

Now he takes a subtle deep breath and observes her expression, looking for any signs of detestment that indicate he should have thought this over twice. The silence seems to stretch in his anticipation and his eyebrows knit together in trying to figure out what emotion she's currently feeling because her face is a blank for what feels like forever, but is probably only two seconds, and when she finally responds the only word that comes out is a short and quiet 'wow' that make him get caught between relief and worry.

"Is that wow a ' _I am so happy that he is my husband'_ type of wow or ' _I can't believe I married this doof'_ type of wow?"

She suddenly spins around to face him, startling him, placing both hands on his chest and looking up at him with an apologetic smile. "I'm sorry about before."

He takes her by the hand and leads her into the bursting blooms that cover the ground in front of them for at least a mile long in an endless tone of the same light pink. He pauses and bends down, carefully plucking out a stem and then holding the flower out to her.

"Thank you," she smiled, and for a brief second he thought he saw tears clouding her eyes before she composed herself the way he'd seen her do when heavy news was delivered, the way being a queen often demanded of her. He pretended not to notice but he also wanted to say that she didn't have to suppress it from him; sometimes she forgot and it was a slow mending process they were still working on...and yet he couldn't bring himself to spoil the serene look she had on now, since peaceful moments like these were things that came rare when you had a country to rule.

Killian cherished that look.

"You know..." she started and he knew what was coming when he saw her lips twitch upward.  "I once read that Camelot has a meadow just like this, and that  _this,"_ she held up the flower excitedly, jumping on the balls of her feet, and he chuckled, so happy to see that somewhere inside of her that child remained. "was supposedly Queen Guinevere's favorite flower."

"Middlemist?"

"Yeah," she grinned and he released her hand to snake his arms around her waist, lightly bumping his forehead with hers.

"I love when you make random book references," he whispered and her eyes fell closed. He licked his lips and said in an even quieter voice, " Sometimes...sometimes I'm afraid that my Emma will get lost to being the queen, and I don't want that to happen. I don't want our love to get lost in the weight of being a king and queen."

She shook her head, tightening her arms around his neck. "That  _won't_ happen, Killian. I'm still your Emma."

He nodded, brushing his lips against hers. "Show me."

She wasted no time in pulling his head down to capture his mouth in hers, tongue colliding with his as he turned them around in one quick swoop that she didn't even feel it, too focused on chasing his lips as her hands went to grip his shoulders and then slid down to begin unbuttoning his vest, loosening up his belt to break it free from his pants and throw it somewhere behind him. His panting matched hers as he lowered her down until her back was on the ground, and he was on top, giving her sweet and slow kisses as her fingers began running through his hair, gathering it in fists and tugging at the strands in impatience because he had begun kissing down her neck and she wanted him  _now._ His hand slid up her leg, causing her back to arch even though none of their clothes were off yet, and the gasp that escaped her when he gripped her thigh was swallowed up by his tongue darting back into her mouth.

There, surrounded by the petals of a thousand middlemist flowers, the king and queen fell away to Emma and Killian.

 


	5. The Queen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I was an emotional mess when I wrote this a few days ago...or week ago, can't really remember now, but yeah this came out of it

**The Queen:**

A hand at his arm stopped him mid-step. "Leave her be, Killian."

He felt a growl rising up his throat, all the anger, all the frustation, and all the hopelessness he was feeling as he watched her turn the corner about to-"Get your hand off me, brother.  _Now_."

Liam released him with a glare that Killian happily withheld because no one understood the loss of close ones-in more ways than one-better than they did, and yet Liam's judgement was deciding to cloud over that.

"She is a queen now. She can't be the princess you fell in love with, and you going after her will only let everyone else know the tears she's about to cry."

"Head back to your kingdom," were Killian's parting words as he spun on his heel and broke into a run in her direction.

_What the hell happened to you, Liam?_

Looking up to his brother, wanting to BE like him, was all he had hoped for when they were growing up, but now Killian didn't know who he wanted to be. Now he just knew where he  _needed_ to be. And that was with her.

"Emma?" he knocked lightly on the door but it was already open and it creaked loudly when he pushed it all the way.

She was standing just a few feet away from him, back turned to him and her gaze facing the window instead, arms crossed and her whole body was just...still. He stepped past the threshold and closed the door quietly behind him so as not to startle her, but she didn't even turn around and didn't let her attention waver from the glass. It was silent. He approached her slowly, knowing that right now she was between needing space and needing comfort; he knew that feeling all too well. The difference was all he had had was space.

Her shoulders began to shake then, and he heard the suppressed sniffles as she tried to cover her mouth to stop the sob from escaping, but it did and suddenly the glass shattered with her scream. All candles in the room blew in and out from an invisible wind as she fell to her knees, gripping the sides of her black dress in fists, hair falling forward with her as another sob made the floor beneath him tremble.

Killian fell to his knees in front of her and another wrecking sob came out as she wrapped her arms around his neck and cried into his shoulder. He held her tightly to his chest, running a soothing hand down her hair and rocking her back and forth as she clung to him harder, struggling for breath in between the tears flowing down her cheeks and soaking into the linen, feeling her pain as a mark left on his skin as he tried to keep his own tears at bay.

"They're dead," she whispered and he recognized that voice.

 The emptiness.

"You're not alone," he promised, he swore, he  _oathed_ she wouldn't be.

Emma didn't respond.

After an hour the crying grew quieter. After another hour she stilled completely in his arms, numb against him. And after the third hour he pulled back and found her asleep, lulled by the gentle rocking he had been doing the entire time, eyes closed at his shirt, cheeks damp, and lips parted slightly.

Killian sighed and pressed a small kiss to her forehead, whispering against her skin, "I love you, my swan."

She stirred and he slid his hand down quickly to encase her waist, other hand slipping under her knees as he stood and then carefully sidestepped around the broken pieces of glass to get her to her bed and gently lay her down on the mattress, bringing the covers up to her chin when she shivered. He remained seated on the edge, only leaning forward to run a calming hand down her arm when her dreams began to replay her parents death and she began to thrash.

At some point in the night she woke up in a panic and immediately threw herself into his arms, asking for confirmation, and when he had to say ' _No, Emma, It's true'_ she broke down again because in the morning she would have to be the queen.

In the morning, she would have to be strong.

 


	6. The Silence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, hello,hello I'm back! Hope you like this one and the other four more to come, thank you for reading, you guys are amazing and have a good (well of what remains of it, yeah) rest of your Sunday!

**The Silence:**

He knows her.

He's seen her before, quietly walking around court.

But never this up close.

She's sitting by herself, facing the window. Outside it's a blue navy sky sprinkled with stars and that elusive half crescent moon that he can get a glimpse of from where he's standing just a few feet away. The candles in the room make her golden hair appear almost like fire with their light, and her shadow is still on the wall, copying her position. She hasn't noticed him yet, completely entranced in whatever she is thinking, and he can't tell if it's a good thing or bad thing by the way her expression gives nothing away. No hint of a smile or a frown.

Her lips fall downward and her shoulders slightly droop, as if she's finally admitting defeat and the deep breath is to collect herself, each finger on her lap twitching until both hands are in fists. It's like she's trying to suppress something, and  _she is,_ he decides, because he sees her lower lip begin to quiver and then she bites down on it. Hard, it would seem.

It's obviously not a good time to approach, but Killian takes his chances anyway, silently pulling out a napkin as he walks towards her.

"It's a nice night, isn't it?"

She jumps at his voice but doesn't turn around. Instead she continues to stare out the window and makes a point of not looking in his direction when he comes to stand beside her, and he can tell he startled her by the way her eyes are still a bit wide and he remembers  _green, her eyes are green._

"You know, some might take your silence as off-putting, but I don't."

To his surprise, she speaks and he notes that it's laced with fatigue and the hint of sadness. "And why don't you?"

"Because your silence probably tells me more than your words do."

This time she doesn't respond, but when he offers her the napkin she takes it with a small smile-very brief, but still the first she has ever given him, and however small he will still cherish that-and gently pats at the skin of her lower lip that had begun trickling blood from the cut her teeth had left.

"Is that why you came here then? For the silence?"

He turned his head back to rake his eyes over the spines and covers, feeling a sense of comfort settle over him now that he was reminded of why he's sought the presence of pages and ink so late at night. "Reading does tend to require that, yes, but I suppose the books and I have an affinity."

She nodded and then looked at him, "Me too."

He arched an eyebrow, "But that's not why you came here."

"No."

"Then why?" he softly inquired, even though between the two of them there was no one to disturb.

She suddenly smirked and raised an eyebrow too, but it was a...playful smirk and it caught him off-guard. He blinked.

"I thought you said my silence told you more than my words."

Killian crossed his arms, rising to the challenge and smirking right back. "Ah, so you  _were_ listening."

"Maybe," she shrugged.

"Well if you're interested," he pressed, hoping to keep her eyes on him a while longer. "Your silence did tell me that you were fighting to withhold some emotion."

It was too much. It was too much, and despite the simple way he phrased it she looked away and he immediately felt a loss, wanting to see that smirk again and that little glint of mischief she had had in her eyes that hinted at another side of her. A side that Killian figured many didn't get to see. But a quick study of her face also told him that he had gotten through to her and that's why she had looked away. 

"So you're observant."

"It's been a long time since someone asked you about your silence, love, hasn't it?" the endearment slipped out but she didn't seem to mind. Or reprehend it.

"Maybe," she said.

He knew her answer before he asked, but he asked anyway for the sake of the doubt and partly because he didn't want to leave. Not yet. Not right now. "Would you like to talk about it?"

"No."

Killian understood, so he nodded and quietly turned around to-

"But you can stay."

He accepted the invitation and sat down next to her, content to be with her in the silence.

In time, they would fill the silence.

In time, she would talk about it.

 


	7. The Death

**The Death:**

The air was moist and the tunnel itself was coated from floor to ceiling in mold, clinging to the rocks that looked as if they were about to come tumbling down on her at any second, bones scattered about the dirt that she was currently standing on, sending a shiver up her spine when she wondered what animal or  _human_ it had belonged to, and causing an involuntary hand to come up and pull the hood of her dark cloak lower over her face as if it could somehow shield her from the gruesome images her mind had concocted upon her surroundings. 

Emma paused, needing to take the moment to breathe and gather her courage again-although it was almost like breathing in sweat and all things dead and forgotten, further bringing on her hesitation and dread and fear of the truth.

Eventually her feet began to move on their own accord because as much as she didn't  _want_ the answer, she also  _needed_ the answer. However painful it might be. Swallowing thickly she tried not to let her thoughts drift too much toward the isolation and suffocation the walls on either side brought on, keeping her cornered-much like how the walls of the palace made her feel. A prison. 

"Rumplestiltskin."

She was surprised by the fierceness in her voice, clueless as to where the strength to not tremble or shake when she called out his name had come from but then realized it was the voice she used as queen, the part of her that  _demanded_ she be strong or else her head would be cut at the smallest show of weakness.

After all, a soft queen was a useless queen.

His name echoed and she waited.

Her anger felt like a wick, just anticipating to be lit and he was the spark that set it afire because she didn't have time for this, she wasn't about to do his mind games, and she was tired of the manipulations coming at their marriage from every end. A marriage that so many deemed to make it their purpose to break. One way or another she would not take his silence for an answer, she would stand here for hours if that's what it took to get the imp to talk, and she would not  _leave_ without her question being thoroughly answered.

"Rumplestilt-"

"I'm here, dearie, I'm here, there's no need to shout. I hear you...yes, I do believe I hear you loud and...clear," he giggled and she squinted, but he remained obscured by the darkness. It didn't matter though because she could  _feel_ him watching her from the shadows, eyeing the way she clasped her hands at the stomach and gently ran a caressing thumb over the silver of her ring, a smile tugging at her lips for the man who had given it to her before she remembered where she was and  _why_ she was here.

"I've come to ask you a ques-"

 "A question!" he suddenly burst out, clapping loudly and startling the quietness of the tunnel. She grit her teeth at his enthusiasm. "Yes, yes, you do have a question and I have answers!" he giggled again and took a deliberate step in her direction, appearing in her line of sight as he emerged from the dark with a full grin on display when he said, "Rumplestiltskin  _always_ has answers."

She met his eyes and their reptilian form, hiding a madness as he silently observed her the same way she observed him, never breaking contact even as he tilted his head thoughtfully to the side and took another step closer. "You know," she stated blankly and he nodded excitedly, smile growing to the point that it could split his face.

"Indeed I do, dearie," he sing-songed but then his smile suddenly dropped and he got serious, lightly tapping a finger against his chin as he seemed to think something over when she simply watched with a blank stare, her own mask on. "But. But you see one doesn't feel so trustful revealing all the world's secrets with that hood on, so why don't you take it off, EMMA, and step into the light so we can have a little chat over your husband's peril or should I say... _death?"_ he snickered.

Emma crossed the distance, letting her hood fall back to reveal her glare, and gripping the bars hard, shaking them for emphasis when she whispered, "Answer my question and answer it truthfully, or I will make sure that you feel every inch of that whip so painfully that you will be screaming for mercy but no one will come to your aid, and I will be standing right there, your torture a beautiful sight to my eyes for all the pain you have inflicted upon others, on  _my husband,_ because I am tired of being lied to by those closest to me. And you, Rumplestiltskin, you are nothing to me, but you WILL give me my answer because I am not my parents and I will NOT hesitate of putting that dagger through your heart. We both know you value your survival more than anything."

His gleeful manner faulted and he looked stunned for a second before he giggled again and then leered her in a way that made her grip on the bars loosen, but she defiantly kept her hold. "Oh yes. Yes I can see the little old saying of '  _the apple doesn't fall from the tree'_ doesn't apply to you. Your mother and father were soft, but you, Your Majesty, oh you have a cold heart. You know, I can practically smell the pain you carry in that cold heart of yours. So much...potential. Potential that I could help you morph into something bigger, something better, something  _evil._ A worthy student if only you'd let me teach you."

She didn't blink, expression hard and set. "Give. Me. My. Answer."

"Yes."

"Yes?"

"Yes is the answer."

The bars rattled with her force. "Explain."

 "Yes, my dearest queen," he responded again with a slow smile that broke through her tough demeanor and made her shudder. "You will be the death of him."

She closed her eyes, words rushing out of her mouth as she shook her head. "There has to be a way to-"

"And he will be the death of you."

Her eyes flew open and she looked at him. "What?"

"You will both perish. The love you have for him and the love he has for you will be the cause of it equally. There is no changing it, I'm afraid. Unless..." he smirked. "Unless you are willing to love another?"

"No."

"Or let him go to perhaps fall in love with another woman?"

Emma grit her teeth. "Killian loves me."

"Then that's how you will go down in history."

Emma let go of the bars and spun around on her heel to leave when his words stopped her,

"Ironic, isn't it? When you finally find the person you are destined to be with and then it turns out that you will ruin that too."

She bit back the number of curses crawling their way up to her quivering lip and began walking away.

"TRUE LOVE COMES WITH A COST, DEARIE!"

She continued walking as the tears fell silently down her cheeks.

 

* * *

 

 

"Killian."

He turned around at the same time that she threw herself into his arms, wrapping an arm around his neck and burying her face on the side as the tears fell fast and without restriction as he instinctively brought his arms around her and held her close to him, rubbing sad gentle circles on her back as her body shook with every sob she was trying to withhold, and he clenched his eyes shut to keep his own tears at bay because one of them needed to be the strong one right now and she'd already fought too much, instead twisting his head slightly to be able to breathe in the scent of her hair that never failed to comfort him and helped him whisper against the golden strands, "You spoke to him," he stated quietly and she nodded.

"I will be the death of you, Killian."

His smile was pained, "And I will be the death of you, Emma."

"I'm sorry," she told him sincerely.

"So am I, my love."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one-shot was actually inspired by this show called 'Reign' that ended like years ago, I think, but I seemed to have been living under a rock until once upon a time happened and suddenly I was back in the world. But so, in that show Mary (Queen of Scotland) and Francis (Prince/future king of France) were in love but that love and their marriage union would end up being the death of Francis and it took like 2 seasons for that prophecy to come true and it did and when it did I was pissed cause...well I had actually grown fond of Francis and his character and so he died protecting Mary and I was just a mess. Here Instead of one dying instead of the other, it would be both Emma and Killian dying to save each other and not like saying that 'oh Killian loves Emma more' or vise-versa, because I think if two people really love each other then it is going to be equal and not trying to fight over who loves the other more or who would give up more or who would go through hell the most for the other, you know?  
> So that was my little analysis...you're welcome, I've made myself depressed now remembering Francis's death.
> 
> Up next: The Dance


	8. The Dance

**The Dance:**

They both stood on opposite sides of the dance floor but they were still facing each other.

It wasn't a coincidence. He had purposely done this to have her in his sights all throughout the evening as the celebration went on. It was selfish, yes, to want to see her even if it meant from a distance. But frankly, many thought of him as a selfish man. This was just a different kind of selfishness. The kind that kept his feet glued to the sparkling smooth marble of the tiles he was currently standing on and had been standing on for over an hour now, not really in a hurry to retire to his rooms yet.

His brother had already come and gone multiple times to tell him to do something- _"Like what, brother?" he had asked only to humor him. Liam had rolled his eyes and whispered irritably, "Well I don't know, Killian, drink, mingle with other guests, do a dance or two with the ladies currently looking at you like you're a full blown meal they are ready to devour, but perhaps quit staring at the Queen of Misthaven because she is bound to notice!"-_ other than ogle like a fool in love.

Well, she HAD already noticed. And smiled. He knew he should be making things less obvious, but he couldn't help the flutters that had peeked up along with the embarrassing shade of crimson breaking over his cheeks at having been caught, even though he had been the one to keep himself in her line of vision for the sake of keeping her in his.

It was a small action she had gifted him, and he cherished it every time that speaking to her directly was not possible.

_But one thing is possible..._

Killian crossed the space between them swiftly and her eyes met his as he carefully navigated around the moving partners, coming to a stop in front of her to incline his head and bend at the waist, unclasping one of his hands from the back to offer it to her, raising an eyebrow when he inquired softly, "May I have this dance, Your Majesty?"

She maintained his gaze as she took a step forward and accepted his hand, "You may."

He straightened up and turned around to face the suddenly empty dance floor, all the ones who had been dancing just a second ago having drifted to the side to make an open path for their queen. He looked at her with slightly wide eyes but she merely flicked her eyes to the number of people who had paused their conversations and he took that as an indication to lead her to the middle.

The music came alive again when they were in position, both their bodies sideways but still facing each other with one hand resting lightly at their back and the other brought up to hover over the partner's hand, not quite touching as they began circling each other with the first few notes of the song filling the room, switching hand three times before the previous men and women who had been dancing decided to join in and anything that had been halted resumed.

Emma smirked, "Did you seriously think asking me to dance wouldn't cause  _THAT?"_

He shrugged, "I decided to take my chances, but can you really blame me?" he took her hand at the same time he turned back around to face her and gave her a spin right there on her spot, briefly letting go of her hand in accordance with the chords before the chords brought them back to each other again and this time he slid his arm around her waist and her hand fell on his chest when he dropped his voice low and breathed, " _You look stunning."_

She smiled softly up at him and mouthed 'Thank you' before his arm released her and he caught her hand to give her another spin, watching in delight as the light pink dress she wore twirled along with her. "Subtlety isn't one of your best traits, is it?" she teased and he smiled sheepishly in return because  _what can I do?  "_ but you do clean up well yourself so I guess I'm having a bit of trouble in that department too."

"Mm, I suppose I am rather dashing, aren't I?"

"If all the women in here-my ladies included-give any indication with the staring they're doing, then yes," she rolled her eyes.

He sighed, "I only have eyes for you, darling."

She simply nodded and he chose to ignore the penetrating glare Liam was burning into his back.

"I missed you," she told him quietly when she turned and he lifted her up with both hands in one graceful swoop. She didn't take her eyes off him and neither did he, both lost in the way her hands clutched his shoulders hard, fingers digging into his skin, and his held her waist like it was something fragile and precious but she could still feel his thumbs softly pressing into the layers that separated them.

"Writing letters isn't enough for me either, love," he whispered.

Her eyes reflected his own sadness as he deliberately brought her back down to her feet slowly and then took his hands away, high note of the song breaking their little bubble and demanding distance that both she and him obeyed by turning away and then turning back with one hand once again hovering over the other's.

"Your brother doesn't look too pleased with this."

Killian felt himself numb against the notion, a reflex at this point. "Well that's because he isn't, but it isn't your fault, Emma," he tried to reassure her because already he could see the guilt in her heart twisting for the gap that now existed between him and Liam. What she didn't know was that there was more reason- _family reason-_ for that gap than just her.

"I'm a threat to your father's throne, Killian."

" _My King,"_ he grit his teeth. "has made some foolish decisions."

Emma sighed, "Liam has every right to be wary of me, for having somehow fallen for..." she trailed off.

Killian wished she would admit it, wished he could freely say those three words that had been swimming around in his head for months now. But he knew she wasn't ready so he pushed down his disappoint and settled for saying something that was equally as true, but safe. "You are more than Misthaven, Emma, more than being a queen. More than being able to squash our kingdom to nothing but dust and bones. I don't begrudge you for this, love, I know you didn't want that crown on your head any more than I want it for my future rule."

"We are stuck in this life," she said bitterly.

"Don't think about that. Think about now. Think about this dance."

She giggled when he spun her around three times before pulling her back to him, and it surprised both of them but he couldn't bring himself to care for anything else other than hearing her laughter, knowing that it was  _him_ causing that smile to bloom over her face,  _him_ causing her eyes to light up with a happiness, and  _him_ that was taking away her frown, that was blessed to see this different side of her compared to what Liam refused to see and hated and judged instead.

The song ended and he was forced to let her go.

The dance ended and he was forced to step away.

Killian bowed, "Thank you, Your Majesty. You are a wonderful dancer."

"The honor was mine, Your Highness," she politely responded and he hated this part.

The part where their dance was over and the wall that had come down for those two minutes came back up and he was once again Prince Killian and she was once again Queen Emma. Not just who they'd been while dancing, not just them, not just Emma and Killian with no titles.

Simply them.

_Simply us,_ he thought.

 

 


	9. The Words

**The Words:**

"Your Majesty?"

Emma could barely suppress herself from rolling her eyes and not releasing a sigh of utter defeat and frustation. But she managed. "Yes, enter. Come and bore me with another..." she mumbled, already making her disinterest clear and suddenly very intensely reading her book when the door opened and Graham was the one that came in and not Regina with another suitor option.

Her book was quickly set aside and she raised an eyebrow, no idea why the most loyal of her guards would choose to pay her a visit and half expectant of something bad. "What is it, Graham?"

He shuffled nervously on his feet and that only increased her suspicion when he took a step forward and extended his hand for her to take the plain white envelope with no stamp or seal or any writing that gave away who it could be from. "He asked me to hand it to you personally and await your response."

Emma looked down at the envelope in her hands, immediately aware of who the 'He' was and whatever side that was fighting not to read it lost when she nodded at Graham and then carefully ripped open the envelope to take out the letter that only filled a small quarter of the paper- _not enough,_ she thought. She wanted more of his words.

Perhaps more of him despite her heart's best efforts to not want him at all.

_Emma,_

_Love has been all too rare in your life, I am not ignorant to this notion. You think that I am happy that you got your heart broken, relieved even. But what I meant -and what you didn't allow me to say when you walked away-is that if it's broken, it means it still works. Its always worked, you just have to be willing to follow it again. To listen to that fragile thing beating in your chest that you've come to hate and hide behind a cage of your own making because you think you are undeserving of something so beautiful such as love and happiness. You do deserve that, darling, that and so much more that you're too afraid to accept or even merely think about. I know even reading this makes you fearful, and I wish I could actually be standing in front of you to be able to cup your cheek and have my touch be the one to tell you that I understand, and that it in no way makes me want to jump on a horse and ride off until your kingdom is just a small speck on my eyesight. It makes me want to stay-feel free to call me stubborn for that. I told you that when I win your heart it will be without any trickery, and I intend to fully honor that because as you see your heart as something so horrible and wretched, I see it as something valuable and precious but with hurting pieces that you must first mend yourself. I can wait, Emma. You are every bit worth my wait. Ti'll then, My Queen. Not a day will go that I won't think of you. Do feel free to call me stubborn on that too._

_With all my earnestly,_

_Killian._

~~~~"I hate you," Emma whispered, but it was a damn lie. A complete lie when she felt her breathing rise, the urge to cry strong and there for how broken she was and how _good_ he was.

"You care for him," Graham stated quietly.

She averted his eyes because this wasn't something she wanted to discuss with him. Not when he had once come to feel something more for her than just loyalty, and that at times it was clear he still loved her. 

"The words," Emma said, wiping lightly at her cheek and clarifying with a guilt, "His words. It's just...he always seems to know what to say."

Graham swallowed and nodded slowly. "So your response, Your Majesty?" he inquired and she could hear his silence, loud as a drum.

"You know."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Thanksgiving, guys!


	10. The Light

**The Light:**

Killian awoke first.

It was still faintly dark inside as the world outside was caught in between letting the stars be swallowed up by a happier blue and the deep navy hue that had loomed over the sky throughout their state of dreams and rest was in the middle of slowly welcoming the sun, dawn just barely breaking through and no rays of sunshine streaming through the window yet and onto her pale complexion- _so much more pale today_ , he thought with a grieving sigh, propping himself on his elbow to raise the covers more up to her chin and lightly brush his knuckles down her cheek, eyes unable to oversee the yellowish blotches that had become intensely prominent on her skin, making her face sag in tiredness even in sleep, signs of what was continuously eating her up on the inside.

She stirred, and he leaned forward to gently stroke her hair, lulling her back to sleep, noting with unshed tears that the smallest movement now caused her pain. Pressing a soft kiss to her forehead, she blinked awake anyway and looked up at him with the ghost of a smile. "Hi," she whispered, and he smiled the smile that she wasn't capable of doing anymore, everything taking up too much of her. So he did it for both of them instead.

"Good morning, my love. How are you feeling?" he desperately wanted to hear her say 'better', desperately wanted hope and desperately was clinging onto hope, unwilling to have this be the end of their story.

"I'm still here, Killian," she assured him, but a tear slid down his cheek, and he buried his face in her hair, needing to smell her and feel her and  _know_ that she wasn't gone yet. "Look at me," she demanded quietly, but he refused to let her see him like this when she was the one slowly fading from his grasp, when  _he_ should be the one reassuring  _her._ "I'm still here, Killian," she told him again more forcibly, and for a second the strength was back in her voice. For the most brief moment she was his healthy Emma again.

"I don't want to lose you," Killian's lip trembled. "I don't want to lose my wife, my queen...my wife, Emma. I need you, I need you with me, I need you by my side.  _I need you."_

"You will make a great king, Killian."

He pulled away from her hair abruptly, almost growling in frustation. "But I don't want that! I don't want any of it, not without you," he cupped her cheek gently, all his anger at the world,  _at life,_ falling away when he saw her equal hurting expression. "Not without you, Emma. I refuse it. You need to live. Fight this, darling, please fight this."

"I love you so much, Killian," she sniffed, blinking back her tears and clenching her eyes shut, attempting to keep herself together as hard as he was. "So, so much."

He shook his head. "You are still the light of my life, Emma."

She gave him a watery laugh, "Despite all this? Despite all the pain this is causing you?"

"Despite anything."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! You guys are amazing!
> 
> Up next: I'm not sure...but I'll probably come up with something Christmassy for the next 5 chapters and to try to keep it 'real' I'll maybe search up actual royal Christmas traditions just cause my curiosity has been piqued and December is really close by. I promise to get some done in time!


	11. The Hunt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was inspired by a quick internet search on the royal family traditions of, like, now for the British family and I came across an article that talked about the recently married Meghan Markle and what Christmas traditions of the royal family she will partake in now and it spoke of Prince Phillip going on his usual hunt of traditional pheasant hunt on the estate while they stay all the way to February for the holidays at their Sandringham home, but since Meghan Markle is an animal lover (at least that's what the article said) she might choose not to go. I kinda think hunting might be fun--not for the animal killing, guys, i do like animals too-- with going old style and the use of archery to catch your prey.(Sorry, my explanation is more rambling and run on sentences than an explanation, the writing is less messy, i promise) ANYWAY, it got me thinking about how I could incorporate hunting into one of my five christmas chapters and I came up with this:

**The Hunt:**

"She truly is a sight to behold, ain't she brother?" Liam quipped as he came to a stop beside Killian and then dropped down heavily to the snow covered ground, his face showcasing his exhaustion and nose almost bleeding red from the harsh cold air that kept blowing their way the more they followed the Queen deeper into the woods.

Killian chuckled, "What is it, brother, the years finally catching up to you?" he clapped him on the shoulder and Liam glared at him pointedly before turning to rub his hands together for some warmth, which only made Killian shake his head because Liam was the bloody idiot who had decided to challenge the Queen like that. More importantly, challenge  _Emma_ like that. He should have known better than to dare his future sister-in-law like that because now they were out in the freezing cold, and his blond beauty had that tight line of determination on her lips that told him they were in NO WAY heading back to the palace yet. Every noblemen was currently shooting daggers in Liam's direction and Killian couldn't help but feel a bit amused by this little predicament. Queen Elsa was certainly enjoying herself along with Emma's lady-in-waiting, Ruby. But as for the rest, well the cold was definitely something this year.

His love, meanwhile, seemed immune. Her concentration enough to fare off the cold and keep her going. He would be lying if he said that seeing her competitive side didn't turn him on, and he had Liam's stupidity to thank for that on this quickly descending evening.

"Perhaps," August appeared at his side, his heavy breathing a bit exaggerated to Killian since their climb of the hill hadn't even been that long, but by the sounds of it, it would seem like they had just trekked a whole mountain top. If battle ever required them to climb at least Killian would know who NOT to send up the hill, but now he was exaggerating too. It's not like he could very well feel circulation on his hands anymore, so maybe he could cut the man some slack. "Perhaps Killian could be of some use and go sweet talk his fiance into leading us back to the palace because, I for one, do want to enjoy Christmas  _inside_ , and not in this damn winter."

"And miss the chance of watching you sweat it out some more, mate?" he smirked. "I don't think so. A deer should appear soon enough to put you out of your misery, but in the meantime, take a moment to reflect in this snowy wonderland to pass the time while my darling brings down her kill."

August walked away, mumbling something about 'lovesick fool' and 'I'm gonna die on this hill' that Killian only responded to with a mock salute and wide smile. Liam had heard the entire exchange and laughed as Killian turned around to offer his help in standing up. His brother accepted his hand and stood up with a grunt, dusting off the snow from his ass and then turning to him with an inquisitive eyebrow, "You still don't like him, do you?"

"Not since he tried to court her."

"Please," Liam rolled his eyes. "She was head over heels for you the moment you met. I doubt anything would have swayed her away from you at that point. Whatever you did to win over that beautiful woman's heart, you did well, little brother, you did well. I will admit I'm impressed," he laughed as Killian shoved him good naturely and shook his head at his 'Younger brother' correction that fell automatically from Killian's lips even though Liam was a bloody annoyance and always ignored his corrections.

"And beautiful she is," Killian breathed adoringly in her direction when he caught sight of that blue cloak blowing in the wind not too far ahead, and long after Liam had begun walking again.

"I'm glad you think so of your future wife," Queen Elsa's quiet voice startled him, and he snapped his head to her slightly amused smile, having caught him staring at her friend. His hand immediately went to scratch behind his ear, and it was ridiculous how the blush still managed to break over his cheeks in this weather, but it seemed to be ingrained in his system whenever it came to his love. Elsa chuckled, and Killian found it nice to have her here for the celebration; she was pleasant company, and a bit more reserved than most people, but he could understand why Emma and her had hit it off and become good friends. Those rumors about the Queen of Arendelle having an ice heart were far from true when he saw the woman calmly walking amongst the crowd and shyly trying to make small talk with Emma's ladies.

"Emma and I are pleased you and Princess Anna could join us for the festivities."

"You mean the hunt too, right?" Elsa asked with a teasing raise of her eyebrow and a small smirk on her lips.

Killian grinned, "Admittedly I wasn't expecting to go hunting for our own meat today, but it appears that my brother touched the wrong nerve with my lass -something I'm greatly sure he regrets now since its been, what, two hours? and the wildlife seems to have taken to hiding."

"Yes, well I actually didn't know Emma had such a competitive side until now," Elsa said. "Probably what is most entertaining is watching the ladies have better endurance than the men, since the men's resilience seems to have died down five minutes into our walk. That doesn't give me much hope if war were to rage against us."

"Ah, they're just uninspired, I assure you. And cranky. The feast was supposed to have started by now and well, Liam and the others are more than a bit dismayed that our queen took his dare literally and dragged us all into a wild goose chase to prove her point," he shrugged. "I don't find it so bad, really. It gives us something to look forward to once we return for the dining and the dancing, maybe even help us appreciate it more."

She smiled. "So by everyone's complains, and the fact that you just said this was Liam's dare, I take it they're still a bit at odds with each other?"

"Eh, they're getting there," Killian nodded slightly, as if considering it himself. "His opinion of her has changed definitely. It took a long while for that, but I'm grateful we at least seemed to have moved past the bad blood between them and get to a point where we can enjoy life as a family, along with all the hoopla of aligned nations and the like," he sighed. "Obviously I am more interested in the family part, but alas we're royals and a whole bunch of other bloody nonsense has to come first before I can officially call her mine."

"By the looks you two give each other across a ballroom, I doubt there is anything else that could try to separate you."

"I do hope you're right, Your Majesty."

They walked in silence for a few minutes before Elsa spoke up again.

"She will make a great ruler, you know. And I don't just say it because she's my friend, It's true. I can see her mother and father in her, and I knew King David. He was a good role model, both of them the embodiments of heroes," she put a reassuring hand on his arm. "He would have liked you. You will also make a great ruler, Killian. You two are ready," she left him with those parting words before she headed off to fall in step with Princess Anna and her husband Kristoff a few feet away.

Those words touched him dearly. Enough doubt had entered his mind during this holiday about whether or not he was fit to be king, even more so if he was even deserving of Emma at all, but to hear someone else think of him as right and ready, well it did help quell his worries and allow him to breathe easy again. He was no fool. These insecurities were his to deal with. No one else could stomp them down but him. And he would. But first he would sneak a kiss from Emma!

"Are you trying to distract me?" she asked as he pulled away from her lips to go behind her and wrap his arms around her waist instead, setting his chin on her shoulder and then turning his head to nuzzle his face into her neck, tightening his arms around her and swaying them from side to side even though she still had her bow and arrow in hand.

"No," he replied innocently, smiling against her skin and knowing that his scruff was tickling her because she did her best to muffle the giggle, but he wiggled his fingers across her stomach and the giggle escaped, loud and free. "Maybe."

"You're lucky I love you."

"Mm, music to my ears, love," he whispered.

"Don't go all Shakespeare on me."

He chuckled, "The man was a romantic fool, what can I say? We share that in common."

She shook her head and the movement caused her soft silky hair to brush his face pleasantly. "Romeo and Juliet is hardly romantic."

"Well Emma and Killian are," he stated matter-of-fact.

She reached up to play with the hair at the nape of his neck where that ridiculous ponytail used to be that she had a fondness for tugging whenever they met again after long months apart. "The holidays make you mushy," she teased.

"No, not at all," he said even as he kissed her cheek and then pecked the side of her mouth quickly. "You're just irresistible, darling, a man can't help himself," he mumbled in between more chaste kisses.

"Do you think Liam had learned his lesson yet?"

"I think him and the other  _noblemen_ have learned their lesson about whether or not it's wise to judge your skills based on being a woman, yes."

Her tone softened, "I'm sorry I had to drag you into the cold too. Fair was fair though."

"Oh that's alright, love. You said it yourself, I'm like your built in fireplace in the flesh and blood. I can scarcely feel the cold."

"Lier," she grinned. "but the fireplace bit is true."

"In that case..." he smirked mischievously. "Can we return to the palace so I can  _really_ set you afire, darling?"

Emma suddenly gasped and his eyes popped open, having gotten too long in caressing her skin and running his nose up and down her neck when he was startled out of his reverie. She immediately went to adjust the arrow on her bow, and he stepped back, releasing her and allowing her the space she needed to stand properly upright with feet and shoulder width apart. The noblemen and ladies had all now stopped behind him, and they all watched in collective silence as the Queen concentrated for a minute, fixing her sight on the whitetail deer a few feet up front, and then with slightly squinted eyes, her hand gradually fell back a little bit, chest expanding and opening up ever so, and her back muscles contracting ever so slightly underneath her cloak before her shoulders came back together, and she finally released the arrow. It flew through the air and punctuated the male animal's skin in less than a second, effectively making it fall to the ground just as cheers and a round of applause erupted for his fiance.

"Impressive, Your Majesty," one of the noblemen commented and Emma politely smiled her thank you's before she turned to Liam with a pointed look.

"Alright, alright," Liam said, stepping up with his hands in a sign of surrender. "My apologies, Your Majesty, I take back what I said. May we go eat now?"

"We may," Emma smiled and lacing her fingers together with Killian, they began the trek back to the palace with Liam and two other noblemen carrying her victory in tow.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so it wasn't very chrismassy, just brief mentions of the holiday here and there but since Christmas is about family and friends and spending time with them well I decided to include Liam ( and a more good natured Liam at that) and Elsa and August to add a bit more togetherness mood, I guess, so...hopefully it got across, lol.  
> Comments are welcome! I'd love to know what you thought!


	12. The Star

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I read somewhere that Queen Elizabeth had separate Christmas trees and let the children decorate one of them while the adults also helped decorate but honestly now I can't find the article to look back on it to see if I got all the facts right (I wrote it weeks ago) but I thought it was nice that they would pitch in all together to add the last finishing touches

**The Star:**

The air was cool against her skin, and the wind blew violently in her direction, wildly whipping at the stray hairs that framed her face -a last minute alteration on her part- up and down and to the side, but Emma let it. The fancy bun her hair had been styled up in for the black tie dinner held up surprisingly well, and although she usually sports more looser type of hairstyles every time she can, this is a  _special_ occasion and...okay, maybe her mother's pestering had had something to do with it, but regardless Emma had ended up liking it when she had finally taken a look at herself in the mirror that afternoon, so she figures it was a win-win for both of them.

_You have to dress up formal for a formal dinner, Emma_ , her mother had always emphasized with the small tint of annoyance in her voice and Emma couldn't blame her. She hadn't exactly been a sit still, follow the rules, have fine etiquette, type of princess. Rebellious was the word that compromised her youth from the age of 13-21. Fifteen was when the fun had  _really_ begun. She should really not feel proud about her little escapades -specially when most of them had probably caused the worry wrinkles on Queen Mary's forehead and addition of gray hairs to her lovely raven- but she did, even if now at 25 she realized how foolish and just, well, how  _crazy_ she had been.

She wasn't sure how it had happened, where in the middle of that had she grown up, but-

"What's on your mind, love?" a familiar voice tickled her ear, and she turned her head up with a grin, accepting his kiss, and licking her lips to that sweet spice that seemed to just be ingrained to his lips; she wasn't going to complain, she loved the taste and the way it lingered on her mouth, always a trace of him left behind whether it was simple peck or fervent kiss.

A fuzzy blanket was placed upon her shoulders before he moved to sit next to her on the bench, a warm hand entwining itself with her cold fingers before he turned to the hand that was hers and placed a soft kiss on top. She smiled and scooted herself closer to him, resting her head on his shoulder as she pulled the blanket to better cover her arm from the cold.

It was moments like these that made her get a little teary-eyed. It still surprised her sometimes, how happy she was, how much he loved her, how much she loved  _him_ when on one such Christmas eve, heartbroken and bitter, she had promised to the stars that she would never open her heart up to another man again.

Then she'd met this prince, and  _God how she'd fallen so hard._ So in love, irreversibly in love, that it astounded her and scared the living hell out of her at the same time. They made each other better. Without a doubt, Emma knew that she had finally found her other half and had no intentions of ever letting him go. He was just as fiercely opposed to the thought of losing her as she was of him. It felt like it had taken  _ages_ for them to get to this point where she wasn't afraid of having these tender moments with him, where 'I love you' could fall so naturally from her lips, and where her smile could be so wide and bright because it was  _him_ , it was Killian that had sat on the other side of her walls and added windows to let the light in.  _He_ who had seen beyond the rebellious princess and stuck with her as she slowly figured out how to put her pieces back together.

Killian bumped her knee with him. "You're so very pensive this evening, darling," he whispered.

She grinned. "That's because I'm thinking of you."

He raised one inquisitive eyebrow, small smirk on his lips. "Good or bad, might I ask?"

"Good," she answered easily, lightly brushing her lips with his. "Always good," she mumbled before capturing his lower lip and tugging him into a slow kiss.

He rested his forehead against hers when it ended, knuckles caressing her cheek before he cupped it, and she leaned into his palm with a smile, closing her eyes.

"Did someone send you to fetch me?"

"I was a bit worrisome myself, love. You did, after all, decide to have a moment of reflection  _outside_ , in the dead of winter, without any  _extra_ item of clothing that could protect you from the cold."

"Thank you for the blanket."

She guessed his smirk before he even did it. "There are other ways I can help you keep warm..."

"I'm pretty sure they would notice our disappearance," she huffed. She opened her eyes and met his. "Later, I promise."

"Mm, I'll hold you to that," he rubbed his nose with hers. "In the meantime, there's hot chocolate inside."

"I'm forgetting something."

"All your family members and mine are currently being gathered to add the finishing touches to the Christmas tree. A nice tradition, might I add. I've become quite fond of it."

"I like it too," she whispered.

He abruptly pulled away and stood up without letting go of her hand. She looked up at him with a slight pout, having been about to lean in for another kiss. He chuckled softly and bent down to give her a chaste kiss that was not nearly enough before he straightened up again. "Finding you was my mission. Shall I declare it done so we can join the rest and then go to that black-tie dinner that I know you love?"

She rolled her eyes but let go of his hand to slip it through his elbow instead. "I don't think they're  _that bad._ Christmas is an exception."

"Indeed."

 

* * *

 

 

When they finally enter the room where the family Christmas tree stands, tall, proud, and beautiful, already laced with a string of red and green lights twisted elegantly along the branches to cover it from top to bottom, and the gold and crimson spheres lightly dancing with the harsh wind sweeping in through a small crack in one of the windows every now and then, it's overwhelming. It's not as crowded as it would be if they had invited other dukes, princes, earls and their countesses, viscounts and certain barons, and other strong allies and supporters of the crown such as Queen Elsa of Arendelle and King Thomas and his Queen Ella that ruled a great region away from Emma's mother and father's kingdom. Killian's family wasn't large in the technicality of respects when compared to Emma's family, but the Joneses still occupied a generous portion of space while her mother's side of the family had the rest, close cousins and aunts and uncles and their children.

Normally Emma would feel... _suffocated,_ having so many people in one place, but this actually felt...nice. She appreciated this fast and moving sight the most on Christmas Eve, where Emma could see with her own eyes how much her family had grown with the addition of Killian's family after their officially union -both in love and politics,  _but very much in love and requited feelings for each other-_ had finally allowed them to celebrate the holiday together. Her mother had been firmly set and quite insistent that Christmas should only be family, hence why Emma and Killian had just started celebrating Christmas together a few years ago  _after_ their union when it was proclaimed and written out in a formal document that they were officially husband and wife; their kingdoms now working as one and the same. 

Frankly, Emma had been more than a little peeved when her mother had downright refused to let Killian join them the first time when he was only courting her and no wedding bells were in sight yet. She hadn't understood her reason then, but now she did. The first  _real_ Christmas with Killian and his family had been...special, there was no other way she could phrase it, and she couldn't pinpoint exactly what made it so, but just the fact that they were together and celebrating together as one big family that genuinely liked and cared for each other well...it was its own type of magical and beautiful and special.

Hot chocolate was passed around in small red mugs and soon each person in the room held one different colored ornament in their hand of their choice. Slowly, they began stepping up to hang their ornament on the tree, and as it was Killian's turn to add his light blue sphere to the mix, her mother came forth and enveloped her daughter in a tight hug.

"Merry Christmas to you too, mom." Emma chuckled softly, bringing both arms around her to hug her back just as tightly, maybe even more.

"I love you, honey, and Merry Christmas."

"I love you too."

Her mother squeezed her once more before pulling away and inquiring with a smile, "Would you like to put the star on the tree?"

And so it was, that after everyone had finished putting up their ornaments, Emma stepped forward and carefully settled the bright yellow star on top. The room was plunged into darkness as she walked back to Killian's side and slipped her hand back in his, turning around just in time to see the red and green lights come alive; the star somehow serving as the guide back home.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So hopefully it was more light and somewhat christmassy feel as I tried to get it to be.


	13. The Cookie

**The Cookie:**

_Emma giggled as she closed the door behind her oh-so-quietly and then clapped a hand over her mouth, mimicking Killian. He rose an eyebrow and Emma tilted her head curiously. She followed his finger as it pointed again and again toward the stairwell, and she almost rolled her eyes because hello! she knew her way around her castle! but then shrunk back slightly, biting her lip so he couldn't see the wobbling taking place there; it was dark. She wasn't very good with the dark, it was why papa always made sure to leave one burning bright oil lamp on the other side of her room._ It will be your own little light when we're not here, my dear,  _mama always said right before kissing her forehead goodnight. She trusted mama._

_Suddenly small, calloused fingers wrapped around her free hand and she looked up at the prince holding her hand, smiling shyly and doing that weird little thing of scratching behind his ear. Emma wondered why he was so itchy there all the time. "Er...I'll protect you, princess?" she grinned and this encouraged him because he smiled widely in return, puffing up his chest. "Yes, I'll protect you!"_

_She takes off running after that, dragging him along with her at a lightning speed that almost makes him trip twice on the way down by the way she holds tightly onto his hand, driving headfirst into the dark and zigzagging so much that by the time they make it to the bottom, Killian's head is spinning and there is the very serious threat that he was about to puke all over the princess and her silky blonde hair._

_It was A LOT of stairs._

_Emma spun around to face him and he startled, letting out a yelp with his jump. "Shh!!!" she tugged on his hand impatiently and practically slapped him with the other in her haste to cover his mouth. "We must be discreet, Killian, or else mama and papa will catch us! This is a top secret mission!" she whispered half yelled._

_He nodded and mumbled something that sounded like 'okay' against her hand before following after the sprinting princess, his enthusiasm returning as he trailed behind her, their footsteps light against the pristine marble floor as she led down long confusing corridors and another flight of stairs and turning this way and that so many times that Killian lost count after the third time and just resolute to not losing sight of that impeccable golden hair being illuminated by the moonlight casting through the windows._

_Finally -FINALLY- they arrived at the wooden doors of the kitchen and came to an abrupt stop in front of them. Emma's eyes were alight with greedy intentions and mischief as she wiggled her fingers like she intended to grab something; Killian, for his part, was amused, giddy with anticipation himself if the consistent tapping of his foot was any giveaway, and also a bit...scared when some sort of glistening, sparkly white wave shot from her body and then the doors were suddenly blown open with a whoosh! from the force that almost knocked him over too._

_He groaned, "Emma, you could have poofed us in there!" he exclaimed exasperatedly because no doubt some guard had just heard that commotion._

_"Too late," she responded smugly, walking past him, and practically twirling in while Killian rushed unceremoniously behind her and bumped into her with an 'oof!' in the middle of one of her spins._

_"Owwwwww."_

_He flashed her a quick apologetic smile and then set his hands on her shoulders to turn her around. The bump was rapidly forgotten when she gasped at the sight of the table before them covered inch to inch with plates stacked to the edge with cookies of all different shapes and sizes, decorated with various colors of icing that made Killian's mouth water, eyes flitting from one option to the other and so overwhelmed with the abundance that he barely registered the princess break away and jump atop of a stool with a victorious squeal._

_"Killian, LOOK! Granny made so many!" Emma leaned in to inhale the scent, stool rocking slightly, and he took a more calm seat on the stool next to her, making sure to place a firm hand on one of the legs of her stool to keep her from toppling. She didn't seem to notice as she simply extended her arm and picked up a gingerbread man, bringing up to her nose and sighing dreamily before she suddenly bit the head off and the gingerbread man was a gingerbread man no longer._

_The rest of it disappeared in less than two seconds and Emma immediately reached for another while Killian dived in for his first, licking his lips, and decided on a candy cane shaped cookie, messily swiping off the red and white icing with his tongue before shoving the remains into his mouth as Emma got two Christmas trees -one on each hand- and ever so gracefully bit the top off, chewing loudly and carelessly covering her hair and nightgown with crumbs._

_"You know," she started thoughtfully, in between a bite. "my mama and papa say that you and me will become king and queen some day."_

_"And?"_

_"I don't know," Emma shrugged. "but it would be so cool! Do you know why? because you would get to be here everyday and not just for Christmas! We could eat all the cookies we want!" she giggled, rubbing her hands together._

_Killian's eyes widened, "You're right!  And we would be best friends forever, right?"_

_"Duh."_

_"Then I like Queen Snow and King David's idea."_

_"What?"_

_"What you said, Emma," Killian replied, annoyed and a bit jealous that she found the cookie more interesting than him._

_"OH! Yeah," her nose wrinkled. "but I think we would have to share a bed."  
_

_"Why?" Killian was completely dumbfounded._

_Emma rolled her eyes, "Because that's what grown-ups do. It's weird, I know. You're probably gonna take up all the space," she shot him a look. "You better not," before biting off the arm of her fifth gingerbread man._

_Killian scoffed, "I am not!"_

_"Ahuh."_

_"You are pretty," he mused after a crunchy filled silence._

_"Thanks, you're pretty too."_

_"Uh...shouldn't it to be handsome?"_

_"Huh."_

_"Well girls are pretty. And boys are handsome. That's how it is."_

_"So? Boys can be pretty too."_

_His brow furrowed, "I guess."_

_She nodded seriously and then hesitantly asked, "Killian...will we still sneak down here to eat cookies when we're king and queen?"_

_"Of course," he grinned with the edges of his mouth holding crumbs._

_"Promise?"_

_"Promise."_

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think eventually I'll write a little follow up to flash forward to when they're actually king and queen and remember the promise they made. It's my first time writing them as children in any of my stories or one shots so hopefully it didn't suck as much. This one didn't come from any royal tradition but more my tradition of making cupcakes with my aunt every Christmas Eve.


	14. The Snow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Christmas Eve!!!!

**The Snow:**

 Killian leaned in, whispering in conspiration. "Could you do me a favor, love?"

 

* * *

 

 

Carefully weaving his way around the twirling and spinning men and women, he caught sight of his love standing a feet feet away from the dancing, hands clasped in front of her as her lips moved to reply to whatever she and her friend were conversing when suddenly a beautiful shade of crimson tinted those wonderful soft cheeks, and his Emma ducked her head, hiding a smile that Killian and anyone that was paying attention could see from afar. Interesting that.

"Lady Belle," Killian greeted with an air of chivalry as he took her hand and placed a chaste kiss on top before turning to Emma and smiling warmly, intensifying that shade that was still splashed over her cheeks. He gently pried one hand away and kept his eyes on her as he bowed deeply in respect to his princess and brought the hand up to his lips, placing a soft kiss with all the tenderness and caring and  _love_ he was able to deliver in that sole kiss before brushing his lips lightly against her knuckles and straightening up again. "Hello again, sweetheart, might I say you both are looking absolutely breathtaking this evening."

"Well thank you, Killian," The Lady Belle said with the hint of a smirk as she glanced over at Emma. "I see you've found quite the charmer, Em -almost like a pirate," she teased and Emma rolled her eyes good naturedly. 

"I will take that as a compliment."

"You can," Emma said. "Belle thinks pirates are sexy."

" _Oh,_ " Killian's eyebrows flew up to his hairline before he lazily smirked and took a step closer, invading her personal space and huskily whispering in her ear. "But what about you, darling? Do you find me sexy as well?"

He got the desired effect and was rewarded by Emma's small intake of breath; she did her best to glare at him but he just grinned, and the quick kiss he dropped on her cheek as he stepped back melted away her resolve once there was a respectable amount of distance between them even though he caught her hand at the last second and held it for the rest of the time. "Behave," she said with only half sternness in her voice because she was too busy trying to keep her smile and blush at bay.

Oh, his princess. So guarded even on Christmas Eve. Well that's where he came in, making life a little more joyous and poking her out of her shell.

"Oh but lighten up, my dear! It's Christmas Eve! Kisses are part of the fun, what with all the mistletoe hanging around and all that."

"You're lucky he didn't bring any  _actual_ mistletoe," Belle said, amused.

Emma blew out a breath, feigning exasperation but he could see her eyes alight now and he took that as a win. "I guess you're right, Belle. So," she pointedly turned to him. "What brought you here, Your Highness?"

He raised an eyebrow teasingly, "Apart from you? Well I've come to steal you away -if Miss Belle doesn't mind, of course; I know you two were conversing before I arrived."

Belle shook her head, smiling. "By all means, go, go, go!"

Killian cast her a grateful smile and then they were practically running out of the ballroom, Emma desperately trying to gather up her skirts in one hand while she held on tightly to Killian's with the other.

"Where are you in such a hurry to take me?" she laughed. "Aren't you supposed to be helping your brother entertain the other guests?"

"You're more important," he responded simply and glanced back to flash her a smile before increasing his speed.

 They burst outside, cool winter air hitting their faces, and they took a moment to collect their breath again and slow down their panting before Killian made them take off again despite Emma's protests of ' _Wait, Killian, wait, I still can't breathe'_. He led them past the gates and waved the guards away with a curt nod to inform them that it was alright before heading even faster towards the field stretched out ahead of them. She didn't notice the gradual change at first, too busy trying to gather the air back into her lungs, but when he came to an abrupt stop, she looked up at him with curious eyes before she gasped in wonder. The field he had brought them to was covered 5-7 inches in snow, a fine smooth layer of sparkling white that hadn't been there during the day or even when the party started because it had just been added recently; snowflakes in the design of intricate stars and specks of celest still fell down to decorate their hair and clothes, the flecks of detailed white clinging to her golden strands and melting at the skin of her exposed collarbone as she looked up at the falling snow in awe, hands spread out to have it dissolve softly on her palm.

He smiled, feeling something warm burn in his chest, his heart fluttering at the sight of seeing her so happy and walls down, too mesmerized by the purity they were surrounded by to remember to keep up her guard. And that was exactly what he'd hoped to accomplish.

"But how..." she asked, shaking her head slightly in disbelief. "Killian, how is this possible? The snow..." she looked at him. "Snow never falls in your land. Even in winter."

"Aye," he nodded. "and it still doesn't. It just so happens that among our many guests was Queen Elsa, and she was more than happy to grant me this favor. With a simple wave of her hand she created this snowy wonderland," he scratched behind his ear, suddenly nervous. "It's not your real gift, of course, that will have to wait until tomorrow but..."

Emma stepped up and took his hands, tugging him close. "You remembered," she cupped his cheek and met his eyes, tears threatening to spill out of hers. "You remembered, and I only mentioned it once."

"Aye, love," Killian said, closing his eyes and pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. "I know you have a fondness for snow, and since my kingdom is never blessed with snow, and you're miles away from your home, I figured you might find this nice."

"You figured right."

He grinned. They were quiet for a moment, enjoying the silence of the night, sounds of the celebration going on inside faint in the distance, and both of them inclined in their own little bubble with their foreheads resting against each other. She stepped away from him suddenly, a mischievous glint in her eye.

"Are you up for a snowball fight?"

"Challenge accepted, princess!"

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't decide which was my favorite one but I really enjoyed writing this one, i hope you guys enjoyed reading it too!!!


	15. The Gift

**The Gift:**

"I trust you will take good care of her, Killian," Queen Snow said with an almost watery smile when she came to stand next to him, following his line of sight.

His gaze was settled on his soon to be wife, watching as she dropped down to her knees, uncaring of ruffling up her dress, and began to pass out one nicely wrapped present after the other as little boys and girls excitedly ran up to her, surrounding her in a circle of squeals and anticipation. Their hopping almost blocked her from this view, but the children's resounding gasps of delight after tearing at the paper with a blur of elated fingers to discover what Santa Claus had brought them, along with the sweet choruses of 'Thank you, Princess Emma!', made a smile break upon his face anyway.

She truly did have a mother's touch. Killian had become further confirmed of it the moment the little ones had first entered the palace, wary and plagued with the feeling that they were alone and unloved this Christmas. But his marvel of a fiance had welcomed them in with open arms and coaxed every single one of them out of their shy shells, so that now their sad expressions had transformed into ones full of mirth and everything that innocents as young as them should be wearing during this particular time of the year. And thought it was temporary -one could only forget their real situation for so long- Killian still rejoiced in the smiles and laughter Emma had been able to spark in them, if only for a few hours before they were set to return back to the group home.

"I will, Your Majesty," Killian said seriously with an earnest blazing in his eyes. "I promise to cherish her and protect her and her heart until my very last breath, of that you needn't fear. I intend to take good care of her until we have grown to be old and grey together, and even in death I'm sure I'll find some way to move heaven and earth in order to keep her from harm and send angel after angel to bring her back to me unscarred."

A hand suddenly clapped his shoulder and Killian recognized the distinct soft chuckle that belonged to King David who had now come to stand on his other side and teased, "He practically memorized the wedding vows, didn't he?"

Despite being accustomed to this, Killian still blushed when he realized he had unconsciously begun sparking up poetry at just the mere mention of Emma. There was no regret. He was in deep, and by the immediate crimson that had sprung up in Emma's cheeks at the playful wiggle of his eyebrows, he could tell that so was she. They were still fairly smitten with each other as if they'd only just met, and Killian couldn't help thinking that this was sign that their love would be long lasting and worthy of that 'I do".

"Well he's in love, David!" The Queen protested in his defense, and Killian felt a spring of affection rise up deep within him when it once again hit him that he was thought of as family and a friend to them. "True love is like that, you remember us, don't you? I imagine he can hardly wait for this Christmas time to pass so that we can get on with the planning. I for one have never seen Emma so excited for a dress, and I intend to make the most of it!" she did a giddy dance right there on her spot. The King and Killian exchanged knowing smiles, both aware that dresses consisted of one of the many vast differences that were between the Queen and her daughter, and yet their mother and daughter bond held strong.

"With that enthusiasm, honey, I can't tell who's more excited for this wedding, you or Emma," David teased and easily avoided his wife's hand when she made an attempt to slap his arm, all etiquette be damned. Killian had long since realized that they were a heartfelt bunch, treating each other as actual family rather than how he had seen other royals conduct themselves with or without any public present.

"Oh for my sake, I do hope it's Emma," Killian quipped in and they all chuckled, the Queen responding with a 'none taken' and exasperated sigh in her husband's direction, but Killian's eyes had drifted back to Emma again. He found her staring at them with a curious tilt of her head and one corner of her mouth twitching up. He winked and reveled in the beautiful red that blossomed in her cheeks before she gave him a pointed look that fell in its purpose to be stern because she laughed and looked away; their small moment broken by her having to hand another gift.

_Which reminds me..._

 

* * *

 

 "Here you go," Emma handed the last gift and watched as the little girl ran away with the box and plopped herself on the floor after giving her a shy ' Thank you, Princess Emma' that Emma simply nodded to with a friendly smile and a wave of her hand that told the girl 'Go on, go on, open it, see what Santa brought'. She felt a pleased smile cross her face when the little girl found a doll that she hugged tightly to her chest and then discovered a shining tiara that she immediately put on her head with a giggle and a look of pure joy that made every bit of happiness course through Emma's heart when she saw that she had been able to put it there.

It also helped to shake the remaining red she could still feel fiercely burning in her cheeks because Killian had to be Killian and do that wink in the most inopportune time when she was in the middle of handing out presents to oblivious children -except for her friends. Her friends weren't oblivious of that of course.

"Oh Emma, you're so in love!" Ruby gushed, grabbing onto her arm while Belle came to grab ahold of her other, and Emma realized too late what they were going to do.

"Oh no, you're going to make me dance, aren't you?"

Another pair of hands gently pushed at her back to get her moving -not mistaken, it was Elsa's because her fingers always seemed to be icy cold- and Emma whined (good naturedly) all the way to the dance floor because as soon as the musicians started up a lively tune, she decided to turn the tables and began spinning and merrily kicking her feet in time to the up and down of the song, shrugging a shoulder when she saw their surprised faces at doing it so willingly and then breaking out into laughter when Ruby took her hand, Belle took Ruby's, Elsa took Belle's, and together they formed a small circle of four, their skirts swishing at their feet and their hair fanning out when they broke apart to do a whole turn, clapping their hands in the air, and then returning back to each other to give one another clumsy twirls that left their head spinning dizzily and set off a round of giggles until the song finally ended and Emma suddenly found herself encased in warm arms that were also helping keep her steady.

"Well, well, well, my love, I see you've been hiding these dancing skills from me," Killian chuckled.

"She's practicing for the wedding!" Belle quipped in from somewhere behind them, and Emma laughed into his chest, still trying to find her footing and calm down her breathing.

Killian grinned down at her. "I suppose we shall have to practice some more then," and pulled Emma into another dance despite her protest that she still needed to catch her breath.

The musicians struck up another song, and Belle, Ruby, and Elsa happily fell back into it. But this time the little girls and boys also went to join their circle and soon the princess and her ladies-in-waiting were gleefully dancing with the boys, allowing them to give them small spins despite their towering sizes, while Killian was outnumbered by the girls and tried to give each one a spin, laughing when they all bombarded his side and he tossed his head frantically, effectively springing a smile from his princess that he knew would only grow wider when she saw his gift.

 

* * *

 

 

"Will you dance like that tomorrow?"

Emma scoffed, "Tomorrow is the Christmas Eve  _formal_ ball. I must be on my best etiquette with the nobles in attendance. This that was hosted today...well the children deserved a better Christmas than all the past years."

"And you did well, darling. I saw the join on their faces from afar, love, you needn't doubt that their Christmas was heightened up by your wonderful spirits."

She snorted, "You do know that spoiling a princess can also be done with affection and endearments, right?"

"Aye, it's what I'm doing right now," he grinned.

Emma laughed and then her foot caught on something but Killian's arm quickly snaked around her waist to keep her from falling and pressed her against his chest to steady her disorientation. "Are we there yet, Killian," she grumbled.'

 Killian chuckled and kissed the top of her head before stopping her hand from taking off the green blindfold from her eyes. "No peeking," he lightly chastised and caught the other hand that was about to hit him anywhere she could, kissing it instead. "We're almost there, I promise. Think of this as a trust exercise of sorts."

"I almost fell."

"No one can prove that."

She shook her head but was smiling. He continued leading them down, this time keeping the one arm around her waist in case she tripped again (not that she complained)

They stopped and Emma's head flicked from side to side, trying to get a sense of her surroundings. Killian merely rolled his eyes at her impatience and leaned down to whisper in her ear, "Yes, love, we are here now," and before she could ask he stepped back to untie the blindfold and reveal them standing in front of the balcony of her room. She blinked repeatedly a few times, adjusting to the darkness they were plunged under, and then he smiled amused when he saw her confusion.

"Wait, my gift is my room, Killian? Or...is it what we're going to do  _in_ this room?"

"Princess! Where's that etiquette you spoke of earlier, huh?"

She shrugged. "You told me to have fun."

"Ah, correction, Your Highness, I clearly remembering inquiring about your dancing only. Nothing of the more...intimate matters."

She huffed, "Well you get both anyway."

His eyebrows shot up and he took a step closer, taking her hands in his. "Truly? I've convinced you to let yourself have fun tomorrow?"

"Aye," she mocked and then giggled when he put a big wet, open mouthed kiss on her cheek that made a popping sound when he pulled away and then captured her lips swiftly and sweetly.

"But first," he said against her mouth and took a step back -much to her dismay when her lips still chased after his, eyes dazed- to put his hands on her shoulders and then slowly turn her around to look down at the little red box with a golden bow on top that was sitting by itself on the floor, in front of the closed doors to the balcony, illuminated by the moonlight. "The gift."

Emma moved forward to pick it up, shooting one curious glance back as she did, and then dropping down on her knees before reaching for the box and looking at him one more time and then finally taking off the lid to gasp softly when a burst of white spilled up out of the box and formed an intricacy of shapes on her ceiling.

"Constellations," she said in awe, her eyes flitting from one detailed shaped to the other and then looking up at him in question.

"Not quite, love," Killian said, scratching behind his ear before joining her on the floor. "They're symbols if you look closely. Each a representative of something precious to you. The friendship you've found with Ruby, Elsa, and Belle. The family in your mother and father. And our love."

"I love it!" she turned and threw herself into his arms, eyes shining with unshed happy tears. 

"I'm glad you do, sweetheart," he hugged her back tightly and she responded in kind by burying her face deeper into the crook of his neck.

"Merry Christmas, Killian."

"Merry Christmas, Emma."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas to all of you today! I wish you the best with your families, wherever you are!


	16. The King (Part 1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, hello, my friends, did you miss me? I'm excited to post the next four chapters and to write Emma and Killian in the king and queen world again. Took me a while but yeah, hope you like it!

**The King (Part 1):**

 

Killian's jaw clenched furiously, so much so that he had begun to feel the growths of a headache from the excessive motion, but he couldn't bring himself to stop. Too enraged with his brother, the first in line to the throne, pacing the length of the study with a calmness that Killian could only glare at as he watched him go back and forth three times, praying that whatever screw had come loose would now right itself again because the proposal his own brother had just presented to him a minute ago was madness and Killian wouldn't partake in it -no matter how tempting.

 

"Brother, I do hope that this wild dog attitude of yours has helped clear your head."

 

"Careful how you address the future king of your country, Killian. Insults like that could be payed with treason."

 

Killian rolled his eyes and finally grabbed him by the arm, forcing him to an abrupt halt mid-step and shaking him slightly so that his surprised eyes would meet his intense blue ones. "I am your equal," he grit out. "and you are not king  _yet,_ so save your threats for later."

 

"Well I may as well already be the king thanks to father's mental illness and his constant absences from meetings!" Liam almost shouted, frustratingly pulling his arm from Killian's hold. "The council continuously asks of him and they won't listen to anything I have to say for the good of our kingdom without seeing a bloody crown atop my head first. Those damn bastards," he muttered angrily. "They want to take advantage and rule for themselves, so much of our gold had already disappeared to pleasing them and now they want MORE. Without father they speak of no real authority, and they see you and I as puppets on the sidelines. Killian..." Liam sighed tiredly and ran a hand through his curly locks. "I'm sorry, but I must do this.  _You_ must do this. Silver has done poorly as regent and backed us into a corner, I fear war will arise with Misthaven if I do not accept this alliance with Queen Snow and King David. They've reached out to me, brother," he looked at Killian with a guilty expression. "The time has come to start making hard decisions, and as prince you cannot refuse your duties anymore. We no longer have the freedom to be fools around the world anymore," Liam said sadly and Killian tried his best to keep his own sadness from slipping onto his features.

 

Remembering the past only brought him pain, memories of their beautiful and fleeting before.

 

"I refuse anyway."

 

Liam laughed, though it carried a heaviness as it echoed throughout the room and faded into the suffocating walls that had become their home in the months since their mother's funeral. After a minute, he sighed and stepped forward to place his hand on Killian's shoulder, in a way that was meant to be comforting but got the opposite reaction. "I honestly thought you'd be happier about this."

 

Happier?  _Happier?_ Killian shook his head and shrugged off his touch, the anger sparking up again and making the blood appear to boil with a sudden fire inside his veins, feeling disgusted by his use of happier when the woman he loved, could have probably loved him, had been hurt and he wasn't able to protect her, could not even take her into his arms anymore because she was an alien in his embrace. The joy and laughter drained from her eyes and leaving only an empty emerald gaze each time he was close, each time anyone got too close, and Liam had the audacity to speak of happier? God for the first time he truly and seriously wanted to punch his brother so HE could bleed and know what it was like to hurt, only the bruise left behind on Liam's face would heal and the ones inside Emma...they would...he didn't know. 

 

"How the bloody hell could you think that?!" he yelled and shoved Liam away from him. Hard. "Her virtue. Was taken." he ground out and he knew it was the powerlessness, helplessness he'd felt at seeing his Emma so broken, so numb, that was making his hate spur against his brother but he wasn't in control right now, his mouth wasn't in control. "I will not take advantage of her situation and you won't either, do you understand?! I-I love her and you will not use our short courtship -something that was real, Liam- as means to benefit ourselves or save our own skins. Whether you become king or not, I will not force myself upon her and especially not with marriage, have that certain."

 

"But her parents turned to you, brother, don't you see?" Liam insisted and Killian glared in his direction. "They are putting their trust in  _you_ , and not every other suitor that has made their presence known, but  _you_ , Killian. They chose you because they are aware of your feelings for her, of your good intentions from the beginning before...that occurred." Tears pricked at Killian's eyes and a growl emanating from his throat warned Liam not to go further. He'd seen it. He didn't need a careless recount through Liam's words. "You can salvage her reputation, Killian. Rumors have already started circling; you can protect her this way. She will be your wife and you will be able to protect her."

 

Killian turned away from him, clenching his eyes shut and repeatedly beating a fist to his chin. "It wasn't supposed to be this way," he whispered, only loud enough for his own ears to hear.

 

"I know," Liam's voice fell to a lower volume, more gentle behind him. "but it is."

 

Killian didn't respond but walked out of the study without a backward glance, and Liam, thankfully, let him.

 

His heart led him outside where a moon was half crescent mocking him with its smirk, and the stars shining too brightly for a night that he would have used to stargaze with her. But now he never would. He came to an abrupt stop at the sight of the willow tree, the moment they'd had there hitting him with full force and finally breaking the dam he'd struggled to hold, but here in the dark, he drowned. 

 

"I will avenge you for what he did to you, sweetheart, I promise."

 

It was silent, but in his mind her soft laughter echoed and right then and there, his decision was made.

 

**To be continued...**

 


	17. The King (Part 2)

**The King (Part 2):**

 

_Emma laughed as Killian leaped forward and his arm encircled her waist mid-run, pulling her flush against his chest with a mischievous smirk, entrapping her. He leaned down to whisper in her ear, "I win."_

 

_Emma scoffed and loosened herself enough from his grasp to cross her arms pointedly. It didn't have the desired effect because the corners of her mouth kept twitching up into a smile and the laughter was still there in her cheeks, red color from excitement and exhilaration just barely fading as he grinned down at her, rather amused for what she would say in her defense. "In my defense, it's not easy to run in a dress. You have trousers so it's like cheating if you think about it."_

 

_"Oh is that so? Or are you just a sore-loser?"_

 

_"Have you ever tried running in a dress?" she huffed with mirth glittering in her eyes. "It. Is. Hell. Damn corsets are tight."_

 

_He shook his head chuckling, and bringing his other arm to wrap around her fully. She didn't decline but stepped more into his space; a silent agreement that this was okay with her. "No, I can't say I've had the pleasure, darling. Perhaps I'll borrow some of yours just to humor you and allow you to feel better about your defeat."_

 

_Emma snorted, "Please, you wouldn't last a day in it."_

 

_"Is that a challenge, I hear?"_

 

_She finally broke out into a smile, shaking her head and playfulness dancing in her emeralds when she said, "And I thought I was competitive. It looks like I've met my match." She had no idea how hard those words pierced his heart and made him internally stumble, even if on the outside all he did was gaze down at her softly, keeping his cool. He knew this was just a fun moment they were experiencing, but dare he hope?  Dare he hope for more with this dazzling of a princess that was unlike every other girl he had ever met, had no interest in meeting anymore now that he had this precious pearl standing in front of him and had no desire of letting go, jealous at even the thought of another man holding her the way he was now, intent on spoiling her with all the affections she deserved._

 

_Emma sighed, setting her hands on his upper arms and caressing there with her thumbs. "But I like you like this." She smiled shyly up at him and he simply dropped his forehead to hers, smiling right back under the drooping leaves of the willow tree. They didn't say anything for a while but continued standing there, shielded from the sunlight thanks to the thick branches and mass of green, hidden from view and making this quiet moment all too theirs. He licked his lips and she watched his movement, hands sliding up to wrap around his neck and breathe the same air when her lips ghosted close to his, mouths only an inch apart. The small gap almost screamed to be filled, have them share the same air and mold into one body as they both fell into each other. Her nose brushed his, the lightest of touches. His eyes fell shut as he got lost in the feel of her, her fingers at his skin and causing a spark to ignite with every glide of her fingertips._

_It would live alive in his memory forever._

 

_Finally he whispered, " So what's my prize?"_

 

_"A kiss."_

 

Killian remembered this as he saw Emma enter the intimidating tall doors of the church, small bouquet of bright golden marguerites in her barely able to stop herself from shaking hands that he already knew this was wrong. He'd discovered somewhere in the early months of his pursuit that she had a secret affinity for red roses, and that was of course how he'd ended up leaving her exactly one red rose every day in the same spot outside her chamber. He never once brought it up when he saw her later in the afternoon, but the small smile she gave him the second their eyes met across a room left no need for words. She liked it, and there was no mistaking the blithe in her eyes that  _he_ had put there and never failed to cause a happier jump in his step every time he thought of those delicate yet strong hands picking up the rose by the stem and bringing it up to her nose to inhale the scent of her favorite flower's petals.

 

The remembrance of the rose and the memory of when their lips had almost joined made something like pain grip his heart and twist it in an unforgiving way as she slowly commenced her walk towards him. Emma looks beautiful, and in pure white, she looks like an angel come down from heaven itself with her golden tresses that he'd once imagined being curtained by. But it wasn't supposed to be like this. In his dreams he was happy and she was happy walking down the aisle, eyes only focused on each other until he took her hand and planted a soft kiss on top, gazes radiant with utter joy and actual  _love_ , their faces almost on the verge of breaking because of so much smiling. If they cried, it would be happy tears. Instead Emma's eyes shine with sadness and her bottom lip trembles with something akin to anger, the hollowness reflecting off her in cold, hard waves that slap him in the face again and again.

 

Their union was meant to be...everything. To him. To her. Next to him she is broken and inside he is being teared apart with all kinds of different emotions pulling at him aggressively. Despair. Frustation for not being able to save her from the claws of that worthless man. Hatred for himself a thousand times over. Revenge curling up within the depths of his soul as he stands there thinking of all the ways he will pay for what he's done, and trying to keep all these thoughts he'd never thought himself capable of contemplating from unveiling on his face.

 

 

He apologizes to her in his mind a million times during the ceremony.

 

Their first kiss is a lie. It is made up of new formed alliances, and grief on either ends, and pain that never should have entered this day but it was unavoidable. It's not the first kiss he imagined, full of hope and promises, full of forever. It's not a kiss that is them. When they emerge from the church, husband and wife, Killian realizes he will someday be the king of Misthaven when Emma becomes queen, but he would trade it all to have his princess back.

 

 


End file.
